Wednesday, May 15, 2013

IN DREAMS YOU'RE MINE, ALL THE TIME. WE'RE TOGETHER IN DREAMS, IN DREAMS.




In my younger and more vulnerable years, I first crossed paths with the haunted Jazz Age fantasia that is The Great Gatsby.  As so many had before me (and as so many have after me), I first read Gatsby during my sophomore year of high school, in that most dreaded teenage academic playground that is American Literature. The book was firmly nestled in the spring of my 16th year, removed just enough from the autumnal reading of The Catcher in the Rye and winter’s excursion with The Old Man and the Sea; it served as almost a gateway into the world of short fiction and poetry that would close the year.  I still have vivid memories of staring deep into the Francis Cugat painting that adorns the classic version of the cover, the nocturnal landscape it portrayed both enticing and forboding. 

It was a great year in my life for book covers and mystery.  I knew almost nothing about Catcher in the Rye, save for its notorious reputation, so when I first cracked open its pages, I became preoccupied with that spartan magenta cover.  It immediately brought to mind the ethos of the brown paper wrapper, of illicit objects clandestinely sent in the mail, objects whose true nature was not to be seen by the eyes of the young.  For me, Catcher held the promise of the most explosive and titillating obscenities; even though I was reading it in the confines of a fairly straight Catholic school, I convinced myself that someone had slipped up and inadvertently allowed transgressive smut to be added to the curriculum (I had experienced a similar occurrence in 7th grade, while attending a conservative Lutheran grade school, when, in the school’s library, I happened upon a dust jacket-deprived hardback copy of Alfred Hitchcock’s Stories That Scared Even Me, a nasty short story collection which dealt in matters such as demonic temptresses, graphically violent mutated fish-men and homicidal children.  Subsequently, I became its most ardent borrower; it was a seminal literary experience and my own little secret in that morally strict microcosmos.)

So it was that in the span of three days, I dashed through Salinger’s bindungsroman, waiting for an orgy to break out deep within its pages, or for Holden Caulfield to begin his inevitable killing spree.  The fact that neither of these events occurred was mildly disappointing.  Still, my immersion in Holden’s mind was thrilling.  I had lived most of my formative years hewing close to the rules (of school, of home, of society), so to have a character give such profane voice to my latent anti-social desires was a moment of clarity and revelation.

But the heart on a sleeve existence of Catcher and its seemingly smutty cover were merely a preamble for the deep mysteries which lay within Cugat’s Gatsby cover.  Once again embracing the possibilities of mystery, I knew almost nothing of the inhabitants of East Egg, West Egg, old Manhattan and the Valley of the Ashes before I embarked on my literary journey to meet their denizens, so that iconic cover image served as a possible harbinger of glamor and danger.  My parents had raised me in a rich literary heritage, always providing me with a diverse and often preternaturally advanced slate of books and magazines, so without knowing it, I shared with Nick Carraway the sense of existing in two worlds at once.  I loved the classics, but I also thrilled to reading of the kayfabed exploits of professional wrestlers; subsequently, the best of my friends were blood brothers, but I often related better to adults.  The intimate revelations of young men (or at least the terms in which they express them) may, indeed, be usually plagiaristic and marred by obvious suppressions, but the intimate recesses of the heart of a young man raised in such disparate worlds are also fantastic breeding grounds for a love of the unknown, a heightened sensitivity to the promises of life, a susceptibility to maudlin idealism.  So though I knew little of the contents within Gatsby, that Cugat cover beckoned to me from my desk, those penetrating, ghostly eyes floating in the night like the romantic visions that passed through my dreams.

But wait, we’re here to talk about Baz Lurhmann’s new film adaptation of The Great Gatsby, right?  Well, yes.  But as the sharp-eyed among you will have noticed from the previous paragraph, Gatsby has never just been a book to me.  True, on that first teenage reading, it was the tragic romantic odyssey that I was so accustomed to from the pulps…and from the world of the squared circle.  But it quickly mutated into a Burroughsian word virus, one that has continued to evolve throughout my life.

During my first exposure to Fitzgerald’s viral heartbreaker, I solely identified with Gatsby himself.  Here, finally, was one of the great modern precursors to the romantic philosophy that been instilled in me by years of classic film, cartoons and the like.  And what youthful dreamer wouldn’t find himself in the former Jimmy Gatz?  Here was a good looking roughneck who literally sacrificed everything for the idealized object of his desire.  Isn’t this what romance was supposed to be to a teen, let alone one whose perceptions had been so finely tuned to life’s mixture of the sacred and profane?  And so, I endeavored to recreate Gatsby’s life in my own, pining after young ladies who resided just out of my reach, knowing that only those who required a Grail quest were worthy of that hazy and ultimate attainment.

At this point of the narrative, some of you will be pointing out the obvious irony of the aforementioned line about young men and their plagiaristic revelations.  And to you I ask this: haven’t you ever been a teenager?

In any case, my dream of the life of Trimalchio was rudely fractured several times by females quite more pragmatic than I.  These experiences, while rough, also toughened me a bit.  But I still clung to Gatsby’s dreamy sense of the possibilities of the impossible.  And that, in large part, was because I refused to read Gatsby as the novel it was, only as the one I wanted it to be.  Indeed, it wasn’t until a sophomore level college course that I finally came around to the underbelly of Gatsby’s dream, how Fitzgerald constantly undercuts the flightiness and doomed obsession of his quest, even as he simultaneously paints it in the most dazzling of veneers.  And so the virus mutated further.  And then, one fine morning in the fall of my 23rd year, I realized that my Gatbsyesque romantic longings were a fool’s game, one with only heartbreak and ruin as the prize.  So I hardened my resolve toward life, stopped letting others dictate the potential happiness of my flights of fancy.

Or, at least, I did for the most part.

The spring of my 28th year brought a new evolution in this virus, one which brought final realization of with which character I truly identified.  For by that point, due to my tendency to reserve judgment, many curious natures had opened themselves to me, and I had become the victim of not a few veteran bores.  I became aware of how I attracted such a wide cross section of friends, many times including the enemies of enemies.  And with this sense of openness came the acceptance that while Gatsby’s dreams may have been the more classically gallant pursuit, I was Nick Carraway through and through: still open to the possibility for transcendence in life, but also wryly aware of the riotous, often calamitous excursions of the human heart.

Feel free dear reader, if you so wish, to insert boilerplate copy about God’s Lonely Man at this point of your perusal of these words.  But also be aware that it should be saved for an excursion into the universal allure of Travis Bickle to a confused young man, one which will have to be pursued at another time.

And so, if the past is indeed prologue, then how to approach an essay on the state of nostalgia which focuses on the new version of a classic tale steeped in such nostalgic longings?  Or, moreover, is it possible to approach Baz Lurhmann’s Gatsby as a work both of and apart from the pull of the past, as a realization of Fitzgerald’s prose but also a new work in and of itself?  I can’t promise to fully answer these questions, dear reader…but I can try.

It’s appropriate that an adaptation of the greatest modern nostalgia narrative just west of Proust has been steeped in debate over its fidelity to the past.  There is, of course, Jack Clayton’s somewhat derided, yet still respected 1974 film adaptation with which to tangle.  Yes, Gatsby was twice filmed before the tastefully glittery Robert Redford vehicle, but it is this one which has resonated most (even in its limited manner) and for the longest time in the popular consciousness.  My fond nostalgic narrative includes a brief chapter set in that star-crossed high school English class, during which we watched the 1974 Gatsby.  My teacher was very much an older woman unstuck in time, a sage lady whose murky past served as a matter of juvenile mystery and fascination for us (Had she really been a nun?  Had she left the nunnery for marriage?  Was the lurid tale of her fiancée jilting her at the altar true?  It couldn’t be; it was too fantastical.  But still…)  On that final day of the film, the end of school bell rung as the credits began to roll.  Naturally, my classmates beat a hasty retreat for the exit, but I stayed behind to savor the final images.  Say what you will about this version of the story, but its opening and end credits, bracketed by the strains of Irving Berlin’s “What’ll I Do” (with its invocation of the divine romance that “tis broken and cannot be mended”) and briefly mixed with the similar 20’s standard “Ain’t We Got Fun?” (the twin Sisyphean questions that lie at the heart of the narrative) offer one of the truest evocations of Fitzgerald’s spirit: the grand vista of Gatsby’s manor, now a haunted house of fetishized objects with no humanity to embrace them.  Those fleeting moments at the film’s conclusion (and really, classmates of my past, was it too much to ask for two more minutes of your time?) spent with that wise, aging lady gave me a sense of kinship with whatever truth lay behind the mysteries of her existence; no matter how melodramatically troubled her past may or may not have been, these few moments in the present bonded her, if ever so briefly, with a punk kid who usually sat in the back of the room, snarkily jabbing at the imagined inferiors who sat around him.

Perhaps the main criticism of the 1974 Gatsby is that it shares too much of a kinship with its eponymous hero: it looks the part in spades, but there’s a nagging feeling that there’s not much beneath the surface.  The sets are naturalistically gorgeous, the costumes period accurate.  The script hews closely to Fitzgerald’s prose.  I’ve always enjoyed the blank appeal of Mia Farrow as Daisy, her doe eyes peering through fog filters like those melancholic ones that peer through the night in the Cugat cover, her canned laugh an alluring replication of the hollow, money-filled one of the book.  I have several friends who view Bruce Dern’s Tom Buchanan as an act of heresy against the book, what with his beanpole physique and nasally voice.  But I’ve always admired the deep recesses of condescension that Dern was able to summon forth; he might not look like Fitzgerald’s Tom, but the spirit of that old-moneyed bully seems to have fully possessed him.  And at the heart of the film lies Redford’s Gatsby, seemingly the perfect actor for this seemingly perfect construct of a man.  In his prime, Redford’s boyish charm and smoldering good looks were his calling card, but he could also project a frozen blankness (similar to that Farrow could conjure) that could both help and hurt him.  I’ve always been a fan of his work, but there have been many times when I felt as if his screen visage was holding me at a distance; I could admire his acting chops, but I’d never be privy to the delights of his Aspen nights.  (Ironically enough, his classic run of collaborations with Paul Newman may have provided the truest depiction of unfettered romance in his career.)  But there’s very much a feeling of suppressed tastefulness about the film.  In so many ways, it’s the Gatsby of Gatsby adaptations: so beautiful to view, so easy to admire, yet so hard to passionately love.

Cue the critics of Lurhmann’s Gatsby, those who would wield the cudgel of style over substance against it.  But let’s relegate them to the rear of the stage for a moment, for addressing criticism as a primary concern before addressing admiration is mostly a futile endeavor.

And also because I was primed to be a critic of the new Gatsby.  It was easy to hear the words “Lurhmann” “Gatsby” and “3D” and think that mindless excess was on the way.  Well, it was easy if, like me, you hadn’t actually seen a Lurhman film at that point.  Subsequently, I finally watched his Romeo and Juliet, appreciating it as a kinetic and thoroughly modern take on a story that has too often become calcified in time.  And then I saw that first trailer for his Gatsby, a phantasmagoric haze of iconic moments set to a Jack White cover of U2’s “Love is Blindness”, and my hope for something different was renewed.

Hope, that great and horrible concept that drives Fitzgerald’s novel, was also at the heart of his inspiration for the book.  In a letter to Maxwell Perkins, he stressed his hope that he could create “something new-something extraordinary and beautiful and simple and intricately patterned.”  It’s this aspiration that has driven many a reader to a passionate engagement with Gatsby, as it views the Jazz Age world (and the eternal world) in terms that are so simple, yet so complex. 

So it was that I (a confirmed 3D agnostic) sat front and center at the first multidimensional screening of the film, ready to take the plunge into the heart of its riotous excursions.  And plunge is the most fitting term for this new Gatsby, for in its full stereoscopic version (ably abetted by Simon Duggan’s stylish lensing) it is a deep and giddy dive into all that is gaudy and extravagant and haunting and heartbreaking about the story.  And it all begins with snow, the seeming antithesis of the Gatsby experience.

For if the 1974 version suffered somewhat from being so focused on all matters Gatsby, this version is truly Nick Carraway’s tale.  Some have been critical of Lurhmann’s framing device, in which Nick lives up to his Fitzgeraldian influence by recovering from those tumultuous days in the East at a sanatarium, morbid alcoholism chief among the doctoral concerns surrounding our narrator.  But it perfectly captures what the 1974 version struggled to: the knowledge that these are Nick’s winter dreams (to quote another Fitzgerald story) that we’re privy to, children of his subconscious that exist as both fantasy and nightmare.  And so, the dynamic first hour of the film as master class in sensory overload, Gatsby’s first party in particular matching the most excessive and bling-drenched glories of modern hip hop bashes (hence the anachronistic soundtrack choices….here, I could go on and on in debate over the seeming appropriateness of Lurhmann’s musical philosophy, but you, dear reader, are fully entitled to not groove on this aspect of his craft.  The 1974 Gatsby still exists for your viewing pleasure.)  The late Tony Scott would have swooned over the undulating curtains in the Buchanan sitting room, virtually characters in their own right that aren’t so much beholden to photorealism as to Nick’s heady sense memories.  I was particularly struck by the depiction of Ewing Klipspringer as not the eccentric pianist of the book but the mad pipe organist of Gatsby’s bacchanalia, long and stringy hair blanketing his manic features, perhaps recalling the late, great William Finley’s Phantom of the Paradise (or Guy Pearce’s pre-Extremis-infused uber-nerd Aldrich Killian in Iron Man 3….quite the season for stringy haired geek geniuses we’re having, no?)


And what is Nick’s tale without Nick himself (hmmm….does that make sense?  Ah, run with it, reader.)  No matter what reservations I had about Lurhmann’s Gatsby, the casting of Tobey Maguire as Nick struck me as a perfect choice.  It’s been Maguire’s seeming wide-eyed naivete (the reverse negative of Mia Farrow’s glacial stare) that has been his stock in trade; it’s what both blessed and eventually cursed his depiction of Peter Parker in the Sam Raimi Spider-Man cycle.  Nick’s eventual disillusionment with the world of the East can’t reach its full bloom without the first flush of infatuation to precede it, and it’s this aspect of his personality that Maguire fully captures; he’s the ultimate blank slate on which the audience can project their sympathies (while also being aware that they’re projecting those sympathies onto a constructed memory.)  Even though Maguire is older than Sam Waterston was when he filled the same role in the 1974 version, the former web-slinger maintains a sense of slowly fading boyishness that the future Law and Order star didn’t quite have so many years ago.  And this is key, because Nick enters the world of New York as somewhat of a precocious man-child and exits as a broken adult.  Indeed, Lurhmann may list morbid alcoholism as chief among Nick’s ailments, but the films overwhelmingly gives the impression (true to the source text) that the tendency to booze it up is only a surface symptom of Nick’s deeper illness: a heart and soul that have been torn at by too many suitors.

What of the central romantic triangle, though?  I’ve often run hot and cold on Leo DiCaprio, his tendency to rely on the same set of actorly ticks and mannerisms in each role an intermittent source of frustration.  But like his old running buddy Tobey (maybe the casting was all a bit of meta-commentary by Lurhmann), Leo maintains a distant whiff of youthful elan, which makes him well suited for a character that, in many ways, is still a kid playing dress up.  His much-discussed initial reveal, in which his hypnotic, charismatic visage, backgrounded by fireworks and the climactic strains of “Rhapsody in Blue”, seduces Nick and the audience, is yet another fantasy-infused moment of Nick’s memories.  By some of the best laughs of the film also come from how self-aware and awkward Gatsby can be.  Much as Fitzgerald undercut his hero from the early going, so too does Lurhmann not let the audience forget the essential contradiction at the heart of this most aspirational of characters.  But DiCaprio’s natural magnetism ensures that the audience never totally gives up on him, much as Nick can’t bring himself to totally abandon Gatsby (whom, in the book’s phenomenal first two pages, Nick essentially describes as both everything he loved and loathed about his time in the big city.)


Whereas Mia Farrow projected an ice queen demeanor in 1974, Carey Mulligan brings an altogether different flatness to Daisy’s affect.  Mulligan has specialized in playing refined yet troubled young women, so Daisy is not too much of a creative leap for her.  But her physicality also brings a subtle toughness to the role that contrasts with Farrow’s fragile beauty.  You can believe that she resides “high in a white palace the king’s daughter, the golden girl”, but she also captures the earthy St. Louis upbringing that is key to Daisy’s past.  Lurhmann does all he can to humanize her character, although it struck me that he may have gone a bit too far.  One of the most heart-rending aspects of the book is how Fitzgerald also deconstructs Daisy from the outset.  At the conclusion of  his first dinner at the Buchanan’s, Nick feels as if he’s been used as a pawn by the bickering couple, and his descriptions of Daisy are fond, while still being aware of the contradictory gaps in her being.  It’s all foreshadowing for his eventual realization of what drives her, so caustically evoked at the climax of the ill-fated Plaza Hotel confrontation when Daisy’s eyes fall on Nick and Jordan “with a sort of appeal, as though she realized at last what she was doing-and as though she had never, all along, intended doing anything at all.”  Mulligan’s Daisy goes through these motions, but the exclusion of this line (in a film that excels at referencing most of the key structural quotes from the book) gives the viewer the impression that Gatsby’s violent lashing out at Tom is the breaking point for her. 


Joel Edgerton’s Tom shares much the same qualities as Mulligan’s Daisy.  Here, finally, is a hulking, physically intimidating brute to match Fitzgerald’s bullying antagonist.  But here, also, is an actor (and a script) capable of expressing the confused humanity of the character.  Gatsby may be the primary quixotic figure of the book, but Tom is as much a doomed a dreamer as his romantic rival, haunted by his past collegiate glories, grasping at stale and racist ideas in an attempt to hold onto something in his advancing middle years, suffering from the hot whips of panic as he drives to New York, his mistress and his wife potentially fading away from him.  Throughout these developments, Edgerton maintains the delicate balance between brooding aggression and wounded emotional groping, a tough act to pull off for anyone filling this role.  But as with Daisy, Lurhmann seems to want to push the audience’s sympathies for Tom a hair too far.  In particular, the galvanizing moment when Tom brutally strikes his mistress Myrtle in their Manhattan apartment is undercut by Lurhmann immediately pulling the camera outside, where Nick is taking in the tragic allure of the city.  Nick’s ultimate indictment of Tom and Daisy as scheming children, “careless people (who) smashed up things and creatures and then retreated back into their money or their vast carelessness, or whatever it was that kept them together, and let other people clean up the mess they had made” remains in the script, but the couple never quite come across as the semi-monstrous beings that they are at the book’s conclusion (a depiction that rings as somewhat ironic in the confines of Nick’s larger than life memories.)  But then again, Nick’s final indictment in the text is also preceded by an admission that he couldn’t forgive or like Tom, but that everything he did was entirely justified to him.  Perhaps pity ultimately fills Nick’s heart more than contempt, and perhaps that’s what the film is aiming for in the ambiguity it injects into this storyline.


There is one more Gatsby character who has long intrigued me, and that is the hard, jaunty golf-cheat Jordan Baker.  Nick’s relationship with Jordan is ostensibly at the heart of the book, but it’s also painted in deep shades of ambiguity.  He’s deeply attracted to and repulsed by her, so it’s often hard to figure how the blankness she brings to the narrative figures into the grand scheme of things (aside from serving to as a quasi-Ariadne in the midst of Gatbsy’s labyrinth…and to provide key plot details heretofore unavailable to the reader and Nick.)  Elizabeth Debecki ably fills this role, her sculpted features alluring, her serpentine physicality and sly, winking visage a source of great and sexy amusement.  But any romance with Nick is mostly left up to the audience’s imagination (patrons of the “Nick is gay” school of thought will be disappointed to know that although an effete McKee does, in fact, materialize in the orgastic atmosphere of Tom’s apartment, the inebriated Nick wakes up the next morning not by the photographer’s bed but on his own front porch.)  And because of this, Nick’s ultimate rebuke of her, his admonition that “I’m thirty.  I’m five years too old to lie to myself and call it honor” is reduced to him brushing her off at Tom’s door the night of Myrtles death with a more open ended “I’m done with this.”  Perhaps my slight disappointment with this omission is once again due to the novel’s mutating viral effect on me.  For though I abandoned chasing after the Daisys of the world in my mid-twenties, I’ve since been romantically enthralled by more than my share of Jordans.  I've sometimes stared into the night, haunted by the icy remove of their natures, gazing for their eyes up in that deep, inky beyond. 

But alas, dear reader, I’ve prattled on too long.  At this point, you’re probably asking yourself if you’d have been better off devoting your time to just seeing the damn movie.  And perhaps I’m just in my boat, beating against the current, borne back ceaselessly into my past, and the book’s past, and our collective past in this fever dream review of a fever dream of a film about a fever dream of an existence.  But maybe, in the end, dreams are the only solid buoys we have in this sea of life.  Or maybe, to dip once again into youthful plagiarism, life is but a dream, sweetheart.  So good night, dear reader.  Pleasant living.    

Friday, April 05, 2013

I'M BACK IN THE CABIN AGAIN.



There are Fake Shemps.





Okay, okay, I'll throw some more meat in the ring.

Remakes like this are always a tricky proposition.  The shaggy charm of the original EVIL DEAD (and EVIL DEAD 2...and, to a much lesser extent ARMY OF DARKNESS) lied in the film's micro-budget tweaking of B-movie conventions, even as it also existed as one of those B-movies.  Watching the original as the calling card it was for Raimi, Tapert and Campbell, you're left amused and often wowed at how they pulled this effect off, how they totally shattered that taboo.  The infamous tree rape is a primitive piece of effects work, but its wildly nasty tone overwhelms any concern you'd have about its veracity (hmmm.....I wonder if that's the first time that "veracity" has been used in an EVIL DEAD discussion....).  So how do you approach a remake of said micro-budget cult legend, especially when the original creative team is on board in a supervising role?  Throw more money at the original story so that you have a refined version of a B-flick?  Totally reinvent the whole shebang?

Turns out that Raimi, Tapert and Campbell do a little bit of the former, a little bit of the latter.  As Joe Bob Briggs so memorably described it, the original EVIL DEAD was one of the great "spam in a cabin" flicks of its time, a formula that the remake is wise to retain.  So we're once again presented with a semi-intrepid group of young folks bound for a ill-fated weekend at THAT cabin in the woods.  But wait, did you say CABIN THE WOODS?  'Cause yeah, thirty odd years later we're living in the full post-modern flush of films like Drew Goddard's wicked deconstruction of the spam in a cabin genre.  In response to what they seem to view as audience familiarity (over-familiarity?), the production team gives these victims to be a serious motive for their weekend: an intervention/cold turkey effort for their friend Mia (who's also the sister of the lead male.)

I'm still not quite sure how I feel about this plot point.  On one hand, it does away with the staid genre conventions that CABIN IN THE WOODS so memorably deconstructed.  On the other hand, giving the lead possessed character (the possessee?) a heroin habit almost smacks (no pun intended) of a far too heavy handed allegorical approach to the material.  Wait, am I criticizing a film that features demonic succubi, severed limbs and projectile blood vomiting for being over the top?  Okay, fair point.  But the repeated visual and thematic references to addiction and withdrawal still took me just THAT much out of the story.

Because above all, EVIL DEAD (the original and the remake) is all about horror on a purely visceral level.  And all these years later, most of us have been living with the children of EVIL DEAD and their progressive transcendence of visceral gore ever since.  Twenty years after its initial bow, DEAD ALIVE (a.k.a BRAINDEAD) remains the high point of whimsically gleeful gore; it's hard to top having your protagonist plow through a horde of zombies with a pull-string lawnmower, or to have him run in place treadmill style because the floor is so wet with blood (and that's not even getting into the film's mother of all Oedipus complex finales.)  Since those days, the once restrictive MPAA has actually allowed much more explicit gore in many mainstream horror films, an allowance that has subsequently posed the question of how to shock audiences when they've seen everything (hello internet, hello YouTube.)

Well, EVIL DEAD answers this question with gusto, 'cause sweet Jesus there are some nasty splatter scenes on display here.  Much of the gore starts out small and very intimate (a shower scalding, flesh munching, nailgun fu), which makes it all the more painful.  But damn, by the time this sick puppy reaches its climax, with a now-unpossessed Mia thrusting a chainsaw through the mouth of the demon spawn of Hell, several gallons of blood spurting forth, the grue becomes epic.

Oh yeah, the chainsaw.  One of the biggest questions/complaints about this remake has been the removal of Bruce Campbell's iconic Ash from the proceedings.  Yes, some of the story momentum suffers from the lack of the strong presence and sense of audience identification that he lent to the original film.  Even newbies will probably get the feeling that there's a bit too much spam without anyone rising out of said metaphorical meat.  But the last act redemption of Mia (the seed for which is planted by the aforementioned heroin withdrawal) turns this EVIL DEAD into a decidedly post-feminist film.  And fans of the original will smile as they see the pieces that turn Mia into a simultaneously Ash-like and non-Ash-like character come together.  Now would the film as a whole have benefitted from establishing her dominance a bit earlier?  Maybe.  But it's still an interesting turn of events.

So yeah, this is quite the interesting rehash we have here.  I'd love to see it again with a packed audience to see how it plays in that arena.  But in the meantime, I'd glad to say that the new EVIL DEAD was a pleasant and often delightfully disgusting surprise.  

Tuesday, April 03, 2012

A Semi-Epic Meditation on Myth-Making, Declining Peripherals and Busted Piggy Banks




Fenway Park, bathed in the warm glow of the east sun late on a summer’s morning, is one of the truly spectacular and transcendent experiences that a baseball fan, let alone a human being, can ever aspire to have.  Even after two world championships in the last decade, night games at the park still feature a palpable buzz, an excitement akin to the late ‘70s New York (heresy!) of CBGB’s and Studio 54, but it’s in the daytime that the place really comes alive. 

Because no one is there.  Because in those still quiet moments before Yawkey Way is closed off for the game day traffic of food vendors and the throng of crimson-clad diehards and bandwagon jumpers (the dreaded pink hats, in the local lexicon, so dubbed for the women’s pink ballcap that the club started hocking around the time when Johnny Damon was still a hirsute matinee idol in those parts), when custodial workers are spraying down the street, when the Yawkey Way Souvenir Store (surely one of the best located retail spots in the country) has yet to give its first ballpark tour of the day, the true magic and grandeur of the place is revealed.  As the sunlight gradually illuminates the exterior corners of the old girl, the aged concrete crevices of Yaz and Teddy Ballgame’s day seem to perfectly blend with the reconstructed brick and Green Monster Seats of the Pedroia/Pedro/Nomaaah era.  It’s a fitting metaphor for the cocktail of nostalgia and modernism that is the Red Sox fan experience. 

So it was that I stood on Yawkey Way several summers ago, strolling around the exterior of the park taking pictures of the championship banners here, the Ted Williams statue there.  So engrossed was I in forever capturing these indelible features on film that I only noticed too late that my wallet was gone.  Spinning around, I tried to retrace my steps, but couldn’t figure out how I had lost it.  Then it hit me: that damn extreme Dutch angle.  In my thirst for the most memorable of shots, I had laid on my back on the pavement in the hopes of shooting those numerous banners from a perspective that would make future viewers question just what it was they were seeing.  In pursuing the shot, I had removed my wallet so that I could lie completely flat.  And I had forgotten to pick it back up.

By this point, I had walked halfway around the park, so it was with exquisite haste that I flew back around to where I had left the wallet.  But, of course, it was nowhere to be found.  My mind flew back to Paris, 1995, when, as an 18 year-old fresh out of high school, I had accidentally left my wallet on the airplane from America.  That cumbersome and annoying experience rang through my head until I heard a deep voice behind me.

“Hey man, are you lookin’ for this?” the voice bellowed.

I spun around and there he was.  David Ortiz.  Big Papi.  The clutchest of all clutch hitters, the post-season legend, the cartoonish object of New England’s adoring attention.  The man himself.  And he had picked up my wallet on his way into the park for that day’s pre-game practice.

I’d like to say that I was calm and collected about the whole thing, but come on now.  Like you’d believe that.  Amidst my jitters and stuttering, I managed to squeak out a “geez, you really saved me there.”  Ortiz’s benevolent smile said everything that I was trying to muster, so I just shook his hand, thanked him again and made my way back into Kenmore Square.

It’s a great story that I’ll always remember.
It’s also almost entirely a pack of lies.

And it illustrates what seems to be a growing trend in modern baseball coverage.  In the last few years, but especially this spring, national baseball prognosticators have seemingly fallen head over heels in love with certain teams and players, starstruck like a pack of teenage girls gone gaga over the latest celebrity mega-hunk.  And like those young gals, they’d much rather focus on what’s drool-inducing about these players than on the stark truths about their faults.  The stories are enticing and romantic, but they’re often just that: stories.

It’s enough to make a level-headed guy look like the world’s greatest cynic.  Take Stephen Strasburg, the Washington Nationals’ stud pitching prospect who electrified the game in his first handful of starts in his 2010 rookie campaign.  As he blew away hitter after hitter, the popular narrative became one of the next Randy Johnson, of Dwight Gooden without the drug problems and epic flameouts. 

I saw Mark Prior.

Yep, the highly touted Cubs prospect out of USC, the guy who, when he arrived on the scene in 2002 was touted as having perfect mechanics for a future ace and Hall of Famer.  The same guy who is now hoping for at least one more stab at a comeback after a career derailed by arm problems, many caused by arm problems from that same delivery (which turned out to be more herky jerky than Hall of Fame.)  When Strasburg debuted two years ago, I saw tremendous raw talent, but I also saw mechanics that put too much stress on his elbow.  One Tommy John surgery later, he’s making his way back with the hopes of fulfilling that potential.

Or take the Rays’ Matt Moore, the current darling of the press set, with his phenomenally easy cheese and fluid mechanics.  With their deep farm system, scrappy playing style and ace pitching staff, the Rays are once again the trendy pick to return to the top of the American League East, and Moore is being touted as one of the key pieces of the starting rotation.  Hey, I wish the guy all the best, and I’ll take more young and talented pitchers any day.  But here’s that reality check again: Moore has thrown a total of 9 1/3 major league innings.  Yes, they were dominant innings, including his masterful seven inning taming of the eventual AL Champion Rangers in Game 1 of the Divisional Series.  But they were 9 1/3 innings.  Has everyone forgotten that whole thing about teams adjusting to pitchers their second time around the league?  Hell, Moore hasn’t even it made it halfway through his first time around the circuit.

Now, I don’t want you to think that I’m pulling out my cane and stogie and pontificating about how rotten the game is these days.  On the contrary, this might be one of the most exciting times in modern baseball, with an influx of youthful superstars around the league and a revenue sharing system that is keeping the game more unpredictable than in past years.  But enthusiasm doesn’t necessarily have to equal irrationality.  Maybe it’s the hype-driven times that we live in, where it’s much easier to buy into the narrative of the emperor’s clothes than to take an extra few seconds to check him out in the buff, but it’s still okay to take a step back and remember what has come before in looking at this coming season (and yeah, there’s a big stinkin’ mixed metaphor fer ya!  Now get offa my lawn!)

NATIONAL LEAGUE



EAST
Philadelphia
Miami (Wild Card)
Atlanta
Washington
New York

These are precarious times for a Phillies fan.  That once potent office is starting to look increasingly threadbare.  Ryan Howard is out for the first part of the season, Chase Utley is a question mark healthwise and the top of the lineup (Jimmy Rollins, Placido Polanco and Shane Victorino) is investing in more Just for Men than stocks.  But there’s still the starting rotation, one of the most dangerous combos in all of baseball.  In Roy Halladay and Cliff Lee, they have the most consistent, reliable duo that anyone could ask for, and now that Cole Hamels has fully  bounced back from his 2009 hiccup, he provides the Phils with a legitimate third #1.  Add in the promising Vance Worley, the still reliable Joe Blanton and a peaking Jonathan Papelbon (who should benefit from the senior circuit’s weaker offenses) to close out games and Philadelphia still has enough to hold off the competition, especially if Howard and Utley don’t log significant time on the DL.

But that sixth straight divisional title won’t come easy, for the NL East has become vastly improved over the last few years.  It might not rival its American League counterpart for pure firepower, but each team has a much more solid nucleus than even five years ago.  Until Arte Moreno opened up his piggy bank, the Marlins were the clear superstars of the winter meetings, inking Mark Buerhle, Jose Reyes and Heath Bell to extravagant contracts, a win now mentality taking the organization in its grasp.  Realistically, you could poke quite a few holes in the Miami dream of a championship in the first year of their newly christened electronic pleasuredome..I mean, stadium.  Closers have a notoriously short lifespan, and for all of his recent success, Bell is 34 and the owner of a K/BB ratio that took a sharp plunge last year (a fairly reliable precursor for decline.)  The Reyes story (all-world talent, fragile body)  is well-known.  Ace Josh Johnson is returning from a long injury layoff.  And of yeah, there’s that pesky situation with budding malcontent Hanley Ramirez and his plummeting OPS and initial grumbling about switching to third base to accommodate Reyes.  But the Marlins also have breakout star-in-the-making Giancarlo Stanton and his otherworldy power to anchor the lineup.  And for my money, Buerhle is the best signing they made all offseason.  He’s proven himself as a reliable innings eater in the brutal American League, and even though his days of touching twenty wins are receding, he’s still a valuable veteran presence on a young club.  There’s enough volatile energy in South Beach to give their rivals up north a run for the riches.

On paper, Atlanta still fields a strong team and a possible contender, but the return of key players from injury (Tim Hudson, Tommy Hanson) and the comeback of one of those aforementioned future stars (Jason Heyward, who was hyped to the moon as Willie Mays Mk. II in 2010, only to crash to earth last year) will dictate whether the Braves will pester the Marlins and Phillies or whether Fredi Gonzalez will have to wait out a painful recovery process until 2013.  The potentially punchless nature of the lineup is also a concern, although the Atlanta bullpen (with shutdown studs Jonny Venters and Craig Kimbrel) remains one of the strongest in the game and might help ease the burden of the somewhat tattered rotation.

The Braves’ running mates in the division are where we run into the slightly irrational excitement that I described way back at the beginning of this essay.  Sure the Nationals are exciting and young.  A full season of Strasburg could prove to be something special, and after years of futility, this franchise is finally starting to emerge from the post-Expos hangover.  But that youth movement also carries with it a load of questions.  Can Gio Gonzalez sake the control problems that dogged him in Oakland?  How will Michael Morse’s season-opening DL stint affect his continued growth?  If mega-prospect Bryce Harper spends significant time with the big club, will he blossom or just annoy people with a mouth that seems to match his prodigious talents?  And will veteran Jayson Worth regain any of his former stroke, or will his signing go down as one of the last bum moves for this star-crossed franchise (assuming that the seemingly prescient locking up of Ryan Zimmerman pays off as expected)?  Yep, a load of questions translates into continued improvement, but this club is still a year away from making a run at a playoff spot.

The best news that the Mets received this offseason was twofold: the end of the Bernie Madoff/Wilpon family fiasco and the return of Johan Santana after nearly a year and a half on the shelf.  And maybe the promise of David Wright regaining some of his power now that the club has moved in the fences at Citi Field.  But aside from those matters, this is still a franchise in dire straits.  With Sandy Alderson running the show, there’s always hope for a return to glory, but the only New York team that’ll be flirting with the postseason for the next few years is run by the Steinbrenner family.



CENTRAL
Cincinnati
St. Louis (Wild Card)
Milwaukee
Pittsburgh
Chicago
Houston

As opposed to the NL East, the Central requires much less of a word count, if only because it’s (as always) less stacked with talent, especially in the cases of the bottom three clubs.  Now after preaching the value of restraint in evaluating teams earlier in this essay, I’ll cop to having fallen prey to overestimating a seemingly up and coming club in recent years.  Case in point: the Reds.  For four years now, I’ve been high on them for the division crown, only to see them go from 78 wins to 91 wins and then back to 79 wins.  The pitching has been wildly inconsistent and the offense has at times been baffling.  But if this offseason showed anything, it was that Walt Jocketty was going all in to win now.  He gave up quite the ransom to pry Mat Latos away from the Padres, but his peripherals and age make the acquisition a shrewd bet.  With Johnny Cueto evolving into a dominant front line starter, a steadily improving Mike Leake and the likelihood that former prospect Homer Bailey might be a decent number five, Cincinnati can afford to gamble on Bronson Arroyo rebounding from a subpar 2011 to fill out what could be the premiere staff in the division.  And now that Joey Votto is signed up through his age 39 year, the offense has reliability in the middle for some time to come.  The keys to the Reds’ success will be if Ryan Ludwick, Jay Bruce and Brandon Phillips can maintain any consistency in their offensive output.  Bruce has prodigious power, but will need to increase his walk rate if he’s going to be Votto’s partner in crime in the heart of the lineup.  As well, Ryan Madson’s season-ending injury has thrown the bullpen into some doubt, but it’s still deep and could benefit tremendously from the addition of the always ready to bust out Aroldis Chapman.

If Chris Carpenter is healthy, the Cardinals will contend.  If Chris Carpenter is out for long stretches of time, the Cardinals will still contend.  Remember the script from last year, when co-ace Adam Wainwright missed the entire season, thus supposedly signifying a St. Louis collapse?  See how that worked out?  It’s old hat at this point, but the Cardinals are such a sound organization that they’re able to retool and rehab pitchers while plugging bit players and aging vets into the lineup.  If the Reds underachieve (which is always a possibility with that franchise), St. Louis could once again take the division, although the loss of Albert Pujols is going to be tougher than most of their recent losses.

And speaking of Central sluggers who took their act to the junior circuit, Prince Fielder’s departure is likely enough to derail a repeat from the Brewers.  The starting three of Zack Greinke, Yovanni Gallardo and Shaun Marcum have the potential to be lights out, and the K-Rod/John Axford bullpen duo is strong enough to give credence to the possibility of Milwaukee surprising everyone.  But there are a few too many if’s there, and Fielder drove the offense so much that his absence is probably too tough to overcome.  At least for this year.

The bottom of the division contains a trio of once proud franchises who are all in a state of flux.  Theo Epstein’s arrival gives the Cubs the most immediate hope for a return to glory, although he and Jed Hoyer have a lot of work to do before Wrigley Field hosts a playoff game again.  The Pirates continue to build a strong offensive core, but the starting rotation is still too weak.  And the Astros are marking time until they switch over to the American League in 2013.



WEST
San Francisco
Arizona
Los Angeles
Colorado

This division is a pretty simple case, as it depends on one thing: pitching.  If the Giants can get any kind of offense out of their lineup, if Buster Posey returns to his pre-injury form, if Brandon Belt’s swing is rehabbed to their satisfaction, they win the NL West.  Tim Lincecum, Matt Cain and Madison Bumgarner are more solid than what the other staffs have to offer, and that will make all the difference.  Kirk Gibson’s hard-nosed style helped Arizona to finally reach the potential they’d been teasing for several years, but the offense is still not much better than what the Giants throw out there, and the starting rotation is shaky beyond Ian Kennedy.  These factors and an expected regression to the mean will deny the Diamondbacks another division title. 

Now that the McCourt family soap opera has been yanked offstage, the Dodgers and their new owners can concentrate on restoring the franchise to its past glories.  All credit to Don Mattingly, who kept this team together last year through all the off-field drama and lack of finances for additional on-field help.  Again, pitching is the key question here.  Aside from Clayton Kershaw, whose breakout season firmly established him as an elite starter, there are question marks aplenty, especially with the loss of the reliable Hiroki Kuroda and an untested bullpen.  Offensively, Matt Kemp appears to have come into his own with his MVP campaign.  The ability of Andre Ethier to build on his progress and Dee Gordon establishing himself as a reliable leadoff hitter will be important, but this club is still several players away from challenging again.  But now that they have some scratch to throw around, that might come sooner rather than later.  The same can’t be said for Colorado, although the Rockies aren’t that far away from making another prolonged run.  Say it one more time with me: pitching is the key to this division.  And the Rockies’ staff is both too young and too mediocre to make many waves.  But in two years…

PLAYOFFS

WILD CARD PLAY-IN
Miami over St. Louis

DIVISIONAL ROUND
Philadelphia over Miami
San Francisco over St. Louis

NLCS
Philadelphia over San Francisco

AMERICAN LEAGUE



EAST
Boston
Tampa Bay (Wild Card)
New York
Toronto
Baltimore

It’s entirely appropriate for a division that’s home to two mythical franchises to have so many myths encircling it entering this year.  So to set things straight:

MYTH: The Red Sox are a beer guzzlin’, fried chicken chompin’ disaster with too many large egos and a new manager primed for an epic flameout.

REALITY: From May-August, this team dominated baseball like no other.  With John Lackey having a historically atrocious season.  And J.D. Drew’s bat finally disappearing.  Both are gone this year, while the rest of the league’s best offense returns with bit players like Cody Ross and Ryan Sweeney filling in some of the blanks.  And that’s not even considering the likelihood that Carl Crawford returns to at least his average career numbers.  Sure, Josh Beckett’s peripherals will likely regress a bit, and Jon Lester might never quite make it over the hump into dominant ace territory.  But they don’t need to for Boston to take the division, especially with Clay Buchholz returning and a strong spring from Felix Doubront.  Andrew Bailey’s potential thumb surgery at press time complicates matters, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Daniel Bard returns to the bullpen to anchor a deep core of relievers.  And yeah, Bobby Valentine is destined to flame out at some point, but he traditionally gives his teams a bump in his first year.  Don’t be fooled by the once in a lifetime epic September collapse; this team is still a beast.

MYTH: The Rays’ offense will be scrappy enough to support the excellent pitching.

REALITY: This is a potentially deeply flawed lineup.  Carlos Pena is in decline, Jose Molina could be a black hole at catcher and Luke Scott is Luke Scott.  Yes, Desmond Jennings is a star in waiting, but he has yet to play an entire season.  And the Matt Joyce/Ben Zobrist combo equals one all-star player, but that’s not enough. 

MYTH: The Yankees!  They’re the Yankees!
REALITY: There are holes everywhere in this team.  Robbie Cano and Curtis Granderson (if he repeats his 2011) aside, this is an aging lineup that’s running out of second winds.  A-Rod is in decline, Mark Teixeira’s peripherals are headed in the wrong direction and Derek Jeter isn’t getting any younger.  And for all the hype about the resurgent pitching staff, New York begins the year with Michael Pineda on the DL after an inconsistent spring in which he displayed inconsistent velocity, the enigma of Phil Hughes, Hiroki Kuroda having to jump from the offensively impotent NL West to the shark tank of the AL East and Ivan Nova trying to prove that his sensational rookie campaign was no hoax.  Yes, CC Sabathia is as reliable as they come, but the last year the Yanks took advantage of Boston’s collapse and Tampa’s last minute run to take the division.  Lightning won’t strike twice this year.

MYTH: Toronto is the sleeper team in this division.
REALITY: They really are a sleeper, although not for a division crown.  But this is a team on the move, so watch out in 2013.

MYTH: Baltimore is really that bad.
REALITY: They’re bad.  But not that bad.  And if Dan Duquette can work the organizational rebuilding that he did in Montreal and Boston (before he became the most hated man in Beantown), the O’s might regain their former glory in a few years.  Or more.



CENTRAL
Detroit
Cleveland
Kansas City
Minnesota
Chicago

This division seems like a foregone conclusion, as on paper the talent gap between Detroit and the field is massive.  The Tigers will still win it, but any consistence in offensive production from the Indians could keep them in the race, especially if Ubaldo Jiminez regains some of his ace form.  The Tigers still face questions of consistency in the rotation after Justin Verlander (although Doug Fister could be the solid two that Rick Porcello and Max Scherzer have been aiming to be) and their offense might not be the beast that everyone is predicting.  Prince Fielder will still produce, but his numbers are going to take a hit in the spacious confines of Comerica Park.  And the impact of Miguel Cabrera’s move to third base is still unknown; the defensive hit alone will likely hamper the pitching staff.  Past these two mashers, there’s a lot of incosistence and what if’s in the rest of the offense, enough that Cleveland’s vaunted youngsters could give them fits.  A return to form for Shin-Soo Choo and continued improvement from Asdrubal Cabrera will go a long way toward making sure that Carlos Santana doesn’t have to shoulder the burden himself.  If the Shelley Duncan, Casey Kotchman, Jack Hannahan/Lonnie Chisenhall triumvirate can be better than league average, then watch out for the Tribe.

Which leaves us with the Twins and the White Sox.  Minnesota is facing the possibility that Joe Mauer will be the highest paid average part time catcher in the league for years to come, and Justin Morneau is a question mark.  That seemingly impossible formula of youth, bit players and timely pitching that the Twins rode to success for years has apparently run out, so it might be a rough year up north.  And Chicago is clearly in rebuild mode.



WEST
Texas
Los Angeles (Wild Card)
Seattle
Oakland

And so we end with one of the other great media narratives of the offseason: the amazing healing powers of Albert Pujols.  The Angels were widely criticized for their reluctance to outbid their competitors for free agents over the last few years, so it’s no surprise that, facing the slow closing of this team’s championship, Arte Moreno threw his mad money everywhere and landed both Pujols and C.J. Wilson.  As a result, the Los Angeles starting rotation will be a beast, possibly the best in baseball.  And Pujols is still the best player in the game and headed toward being one of the best of all time.  But it can’t be denied that his overall numbers have been in steady decline, and that decline has occurred in a league with weaker competition and overall weaker pitching.  He’ll mash for the Angels, but he’s not getting any younger, and even if he defies the average aging pattern he still won’t keep up his production for that long.  Which is a problem, because people seem to forget how bad this offense was last year.  Their OPS leader?  Howie Kendrick, with a subpar .802.  I keep hearing that Torii Hunter is in great shape, but he’s also 36.  And don’t even start with the Vernon Wells comeback talk.  Throw in the question of Kendrys Morales returning from injury and a relatively unproven gaggle of youngsters and you have a club that’s better, but not quite up to par with Texas. 

Now the Rangers face the opposite problem, as their starting staff is slightly up in the air after losing Wilson.  If Yu Darvish bucks the trend of recent Japanese pitching flameouts, the relative depth of the starting five should be enough to keep them in games.  Which should be enough to win the division, because the Rangers’ offense remains scary good.  Josh Hamilton is a regression candidate, but even if his numbers fall off he has such a stellar supporting cast around him one through nine that it might not make a difference.  Normally, I’d preach the good gospel of great pitching outlasting a great offense, but with Los Angeles’s anemic offense in play, the Rangers should have enough to edge them in the West.

And then there are the Mariners and Athletics, two teams still building for a future of some sort.  For the A’s, there’s the promise of relocation to San Jose, so this year will likely focus around the American debut of Yoennis Cespedes and whether Manny Ramirez has any production left in him.  The Mariners still have the amazing Felix Hernandez and a good core of young hitters (led by Dustin Ackley and Justin Smoak), but they’re several years away from returning to the postseason.

PLAYOFFS

WILD CARD PLAY-IN
Los Angeles over Tampa Bay

DIVISIONAL ROUND
Boston over Texas
Detroit over Los Angeles

ALCS
Boston over Detroit

WORLD SERIES
Boston over Philadelphia
-One year later, the trendy 2011 pick comes true.  Philly makes what might be one last run at a title, while Boston picks themselves up and resumes their pre-August 2011 form.